WHATS A BJ?

Rob and I was standing outside the hostel in Yangshuo. A Chinese guy walks past us with a T-shirt on saying: last night a BJ saved my life. We obviously played around with it, funny t-shirt. Then a Chinese woman comes along and ask us: What is a BJ?

Rob: hum.. It’s a sexual act.
Me: I’ll just say it… It’s a blow job.
Rob: hahaha
Chinese lady: Blow Job?
Rob: it’s kind of like a job, you just don’t get payd for it.
Me: well, sometimes you do.
Rob: haha yeah I guess.. I surely haven’t done it!
Me: sure you have ;)

Chinese lady still don’t know what it is. Funny t-shirt!

Child Abuse

I was standing on the subwdaystation waiting for the subway. A 5-8 year old girl was sitting on her fathers lap crying and hyperventilating. Suddenly he lifts her up and throw her in the ground and starts hitting her and kicking her. I was right next to them and of course interfered. Ha push and a slap was appropriate in the situation. A lot of Chinese people was involved as well. He pushed everyone away and lifted up the girl again and walked towards the tracks. I’d taken a couple of steps back when this happened. He was going to throw the girl down at the tracks. Of course a lot of Chinese people stopped him. He got a good piece of punshes and the girl was taken away. The police came to the scene. What happens after this is unknown.

I only hope that he won’t have anything to do with that young child again. Imagin what he does behind locked doors when this is what he does in public!

Dead guy in the river

It was a warm sunny day and we had crossed the border from Mongolia into China. It was a good atmosphere in our carriage. A lot of backpackers and likeminded tourist. The train was crawling through a big mountain range. Beautiful scenery, big mountains, waterfalls, rivers, vegetation and fishermen along the river. We could see everything because the train was driving slowly. It was a really nice day.

We were driving along a river for a long time. Upstream was full of Chinese fishermen trying to catch some good fish. However downstream got more and more rough, and that’s when we saw it. A man had probably fell while fishing. He was laying behind two big rocks where the water was calm. Pale white and we could really se that he was dead. Face down in the water and not moving. Although many Chinese people are white, they are not this white!

It was quite disturbing to see a dead body. The bad thing is that we didn’t tell anyone, because we were staring at it for maybe half a minute, and then talked about it. During that time it was too late to find the staff on the train and tell them what we had seen. Besides we don’t know the exact location either.

If it had been in Norway it would be easier, but since no one spoke English on the train it would be difficult to explain.

Bullets and airports

I wrote in my blog about a security guard giving me a bullet. Yes, a proper bullet. Later that night I put the bullet in my bag. I didn’t think more about it. Weapons is quite common in this country. There’s weapon stores in every town. I didn’t think it was very illegal, specially since it is this common.

So after a couple of days I was entering the airport. Sent my backpack through the scanning machine and was smiling politely to the guards as always.

They stopped the machine and looked closer at my bag. The bullet didn’t cross my mind at all. I was a bit nervous, because you don’t wanna have five angry guards pointing their guns at you. Which they did. I was asked to open my bag and give them my bullet. I did it without questioning it. The man in charge told me to take my bag and join him into a room. On the way I had a couple of guards behind me and he walked infront. It was scary, very scary. The guards walked away and the man in charge was sitting infront of me. He found a book, a pen and a phone. He asked me why I had a bullet in my bag and how I got it. I told him the truth straight away and explained that it was a souvenir from a security guard. I didn’t tell them which security guard it was, that wasn’t important in this case. He continued to ask questions like what he should do. He understood that it was a casual thing and that I wasn’t supposed to use it, but I did in fact do something illegal. I need a certificate to carry ammunition. That’s not all. Since this was at an airport I caused a terrorist threat. The philippines doesn’t take stuff like this easily.

He started sweating, because he didn’t want to call the police on me, because he understood and knew that this was only for fun. On the other side he had to do his job. For all he knew I was an undercover guy sent by the police to make sure they didn’t take a bribe.

I offered him a small bribe quite early in, 5000peso which is equal to 625kr. He said no instantly and explained that he would not accept a bribe. Later on I tried again with 10 000 which is close to 1250kr/125£, he once again said that this was NOT about money. He asked me about my agenda in the philippines. I told him that I was visiting a friend in a place called Clark. Gender was not mentioned, but he assumed it was a girl. I followed up with a vacation at Boracay before I left the country. After some more questions I tried to raise the bribe to 20 000peso/2500kr/250£. Still no luck and he told me that this was not about the money and that I had to stop asking. He was having a hard time deciding what to do. He told me that if he picked up this phone I would most likely go to jail for around 50 years for terrorist threats and illegally carrying ammunition. I kind of panicked and told him that I was willing to go to the ATM and get 30 000peso/3750kr/375£. he said no once again, but he stopped to think and went quiet for 5 minutes. He said he would take 10 000peso and he didn’t want to see me again, ever. I had to sign a paper that said it was only a empty shell and a mistake made by him. He let me go, and I only just made my flight.

After 1 and a half hour in that room I was so sweaty and I was freaking out.. I have never in my life been more scared, I wouldn’t wish something like this on anyone. It is by far the worst experience I have ever been through.

Mc Donalds sent from heaven

This took place in Shanghai late at night. It was a clear night. We could see the stars and everything. We had been out clubbing all night, and we decided to call it the night, but first Mc Donald’s.

We began to ask around if anyone knew where we could find one. I overheard a conversation a French couple had about Mc Donald’s, and I saw them walk in a certain direction five minutes before us. We headed the same way as them. We walked and walked but could not find it anywhere! After a bit over one hour we was tired and sick of searching. As we turned around to go back to the club we heard the most beautiful sound behind us.. Tut tut!

It was an amazing sight! A Mc Donald’s delivery scooter can behind us! We stopped him instantly and he amazingly took our order. He wanted to know the adress where it should be delivered to.. We looked at each other and everybody pointed to the place we were standing! It was such an amazing feeling!

He drove off with our order and came back twenty minutes later! I have never ever been more happy about my Mc Donald’s food. It’s the best bigmac I have ever tasted. Thank you Mc Donald’s!